Saturday, August 12, 2017
I was driving home from work tonight and I was thinking about promises Nick had made to me about paying me back for my providing the down payment on the farm etc. A family member or friend must think I am very stupid for agreeing to this financial arrangement ie me paying for everything. But Nick had told me that he would be able to match my down payment after he sold his house and that he would be working at his job for another 4, 5 or 6 years, or 'whatever it took' for him to pay down the mortgage on the farm so that his contribution was equal to mine. He said he would take over the mortgage and I could put all my earnings toward my retirement. As I now know, this was never his intention. he had other financial obligations which prevented him from having any disposable income, and when he sold his house, he received only $1,638 to compare to my $214,000 and as well he fell way short of matching my down payment of $90,000. And then he retired suddenly without paying down any of the mortgage. In fact, he walked into the bank one day and withdrew every penny we had paid on the mortgage and put this $31,000 on his VISA. Not exactly what was planned. Not honouring his verbal agreement. As I understand it, verbal agreements are supposed to be as binding as any other sort of agreement. Or not.
Nick also promised over and over that he would be 'working his ass off' to make improvements and clear the land etc etc and this would have increased the value of the property but instead he has done absolutely nothing and the property is in a sad state of disrepair. He won't let me get anyone out here to do anything as he says he will not permit anyone on the property, even to cut firewood or fix the fences. So what am I to do? Wait I guess, and fix up what I can. And hope that Nick decides to start a life with this Ukrainian woman and leaves me alone to pick up the pieces of mine. I wouldn't care so much if I were younger. It's not that I fell old, but my birth certificate tell me I will be 60 soon, and that most folks retire when they are 65. But I have to just about start over financially at this point. It's good thing I have never had any high expectations for my retirement years.
Saturday, 12 August 2017
Friday, 11 August 2017
Friday, August 11, 2017
Friday, August 11, 2017
Another beautiful summer day. I did manage to locate Nick's previous wife on the internet (previous to me that is, I know about 2 others previous to this 3rd one - he has always led me to believe I was number 3). She still lives and works in the area and I intend to contact her somehow to find out what Nick's daughter actually did do to her, that was much worse than what she threatened to do to me. This is getting good now.
The most recent documents I found state that she is entitled to 9 years of his pension and also that he gave her a lump sum payment of spousal support in May of 2011 and also that he paid her a sum of money so he could retain sole ownership of the house he was living in. \which he led me to believe was his alone and also which he told me he would likely make a profit on when he sold it to move to the farm. Of course, he made nothing on it but somewhat less than two thousand dollars, after back taxes were paid. A far cry from the two hundred and fifteen thousand I received from my home. The hole just keeps getting deeper.
There was also a comment in the papers about the TD Bank being agreeable about the mortgage situation, which leads me to think it must have been in arrears. Nick's divorce from this woman was only final in May of 2011. I had no idea any of this was going on. He was also embroiled at the same time in a legal battle with the ex-wife who is the mother of the younger two of his four children; something about her claiming that the daughter had moved in with her and she wanted to be re-imbursed for expenses during this time and also for things she had purchased for her daughter. As far as I know, this decision went in Nick's favour and he didn't have to pay anything to anybody.
When I got home from work tonight Nick was locked in the computer room and the door to the house was locked and the porch light was out so I had trouble seeing to get my key in the lock. I don't know why he does this. It's not like I am so late getting home from work that he has reason to believe I am staying somewhere else. Like I ever do that. Like I only did that once, last weekend. And I texted him to let him know.
I noticed today as I did some on-line banking that Nick still has not taken his daughter off of the insurance policy that I pay for, which he promised to do when I told him I had discovered that I was paying insurance on a Saturn that I had no idea even existed. I feel I am being generous paying his car insurance just because it happens to be together with the house insurance, and I actually would like to cancel the insurance on both cars, but I am a fair person and I realize Nick is paying for my cell phone. Which I had decided not to get as I thought they wanted way too much for the phone, but which Nick went ahead and got anyway. I do suspect he did this so I would have the same phone as he did and he would be able to access it on the sly. But the way it has worked out, I don't think he has been in my phone where there is really nothing of interest anyway, but I have been able to look into his phone which I can look around in quite quickly because it is the same as mine.
I am going to mention one more thing for the record before I turn off my computer and catch some sleep. I may have mentioned this before, but I wanted to make a note of the fact that when the tractor and the attachments we had ordered were delivered, Nick called the salesman back to tell him that there was a piece missing. I seem to remember it was a piece that was needed in order to use the auger attachment. The tractor guys asked if Nick was sure he hadn't gotten it, because they had had to have it made separately for some reason, and they knew it had been made and they knew they didn't have it. Because Nick was a new customer and was getting an expensive tractor from them, they agreed to deliver a second one.
Almost a year later, Nick told me that he had found the original piece laying in the corner of the garage and admitted he felt embarrassed that he now had two. This tells me that he perhaps actually does believe that things are missing when in fact he just doesn't know where they are. But why make up a story about a guy named Salter coming into the house and stealing stuff. It seems like a lot of trouble to go to just to avoid saying you made a mistake.
So you say you screwed up. Everyone screws up. And if someone says they don't, then I think they must be lying. But why bother to lie, last time I checked making a mistake didn't mean the death penalty.
Another beautiful summer day. I did manage to locate Nick's previous wife on the internet (previous to me that is, I know about 2 others previous to this 3rd one - he has always led me to believe I was number 3). She still lives and works in the area and I intend to contact her somehow to find out what Nick's daughter actually did do to her, that was much worse than what she threatened to do to me. This is getting good now.
The most recent documents I found state that she is entitled to 9 years of his pension and also that he gave her a lump sum payment of spousal support in May of 2011 and also that he paid her a sum of money so he could retain sole ownership of the house he was living in. \which he led me to believe was his alone and also which he told me he would likely make a profit on when he sold it to move to the farm. Of course, he made nothing on it but somewhat less than two thousand dollars, after back taxes were paid. A far cry from the two hundred and fifteen thousand I received from my home. The hole just keeps getting deeper.
There was also a comment in the papers about the TD Bank being agreeable about the mortgage situation, which leads me to think it must have been in arrears. Nick's divorce from this woman was only final in May of 2011. I had no idea any of this was going on. He was also embroiled at the same time in a legal battle with the ex-wife who is the mother of the younger two of his four children; something about her claiming that the daughter had moved in with her and she wanted to be re-imbursed for expenses during this time and also for things she had purchased for her daughter. As far as I know, this decision went in Nick's favour and he didn't have to pay anything to anybody.
When I got home from work tonight Nick was locked in the computer room and the door to the house was locked and the porch light was out so I had trouble seeing to get my key in the lock. I don't know why he does this. It's not like I am so late getting home from work that he has reason to believe I am staying somewhere else. Like I ever do that. Like I only did that once, last weekend. And I texted him to let him know.
I noticed today as I did some on-line banking that Nick still has not taken his daughter off of the insurance policy that I pay for, which he promised to do when I told him I had discovered that I was paying insurance on a Saturn that I had no idea even existed. I feel I am being generous paying his car insurance just because it happens to be together with the house insurance, and I actually would like to cancel the insurance on both cars, but I am a fair person and I realize Nick is paying for my cell phone. Which I had decided not to get as I thought they wanted way too much for the phone, but which Nick went ahead and got anyway. I do suspect he did this so I would have the same phone as he did and he would be able to access it on the sly. But the way it has worked out, I don't think he has been in my phone where there is really nothing of interest anyway, but I have been able to look into his phone which I can look around in quite quickly because it is the same as mine.
I am going to mention one more thing for the record before I turn off my computer and catch some sleep. I may have mentioned this before, but I wanted to make a note of the fact that when the tractor and the attachments we had ordered were delivered, Nick called the salesman back to tell him that there was a piece missing. I seem to remember it was a piece that was needed in order to use the auger attachment. The tractor guys asked if Nick was sure he hadn't gotten it, because they had had to have it made separately for some reason, and they knew it had been made and they knew they didn't have it. Because Nick was a new customer and was getting an expensive tractor from them, they agreed to deliver a second one.
Almost a year later, Nick told me that he had found the original piece laying in the corner of the garage and admitted he felt embarrassed that he now had two. This tells me that he perhaps actually does believe that things are missing when in fact he just doesn't know where they are. But why make up a story about a guy named Salter coming into the house and stealing stuff. It seems like a lot of trouble to go to just to avoid saying you made a mistake.
So you say you screwed up. Everyone screws up. And if someone says they don't, then I think they must be lying. But why bother to lie, last time I checked making a mistake didn't mean the death penalty.
Thursday, 10 August 2017
Thursday, August 10, 2017
Thursday, August 10, 2017
A beautiful summer day. I slept in, as I usually do, as a result of Nick getting up at 430am and using the bathroom and flushing the toilet. That is something I was brought up not to do during the night, once it is agreed upon amongst members of a household. He never used to do it either, until a couple of months ago, because he knows it wakes me up. Actually, nearly everything wakes me up.
After using the bathroom, Nick will usually go downstairs to make a coffee or get a glass of water and then he will read for a an hour or two. As a result of the weather being so humid and warm, he and I have been sleeping with our bedroom doors open and so when he has the light on in his room, I keep waking up. And shortly after he quits reading and turns off the light to go back to sleep, my alarm goes off and I have to get up for the day. So on my days off, I roll over and go back to sleep until I am convinced I am well rested.
Nick and I took the lawn mower apart and I succeeded in finding the tools we needed to do this in impressive time. It was great, he described what it was I should be looking for and while he was still muttering that Salter had stolen them and they couldn't be found anywhere in the house, I would present them to him. Part of it was luck, I will admit, and part of it was because I have cleaned up the basement and the garage, so if I know what something looks like, I am getting pretty good at finding it now. If I knew my tools better, this would be even easier.
So I got the back yard done, and the second section of the front that I had started when the mower decided to quit. I also cut some of the grass by the riding arena - an area we used to keep cut but we have let grow over the last two years. I decided to cut it again to make the property look neater.
Then I had to go to meet up with the guy who bought my daughter's car, just over an hour's drive away. I was not looking forward to making this trip in the middle of my day, but I did a couple of errands on the way, and got home by 630pm. I vacuumed and started to take the skylight down to clean it, but I realized it was to large and awkward for me to do alone, and I decided to wait until my next day off to do it when I could get Nick to help me take it down. I cut myself some spinach and beet greens and green onions from the garden for lunch tomorrow at work. The first produce of 2017!
I have some cucumbers coming up and also some squash, along with corn and beans, and Nick has tomatoes that will be ready soon. We didn't plant nearly as much as we have in previous years, but we always seem to have way more than we manage to use or give away. It's so exciting and rewarding at first, but picking the produce turns into a chore by the end of the season.
When I was putting a wash in, I took another look through the court documents that concerned Nick's wife just previous to myself, the one to whom I have just learned he has been paying $500 a month support. I was looking to see if her former last name was mentioned anywhere and it was. I had googled her using the same last name as Nick because that is how she was referred to in the stuff I found initially and nothing came up in the searches I did, so I am hoping I will find something interesting now that I have another name to do a new search with. I will do it at work so it doesn't show in the history on my laptop. Of course if he reads my posts he will find out what I know but I am counting on that being like finding a needle in a haystack. Nick isn't very good at finding things.
He wasn't home when I got back from dealing with the car, and I had a nice evening with myself and my dog. As it began to get dark around 830pm, I decided to go out and bring the horses in and feed them and the calf. The horses kept running up to the gate each time they saw me outside and I knew it was past the time they usually come in for their grain and water and a small pile of hay for them to munch on. They are out in the pasture all day, so they really don't need much in the way of hay, but grain is a real treat for them. We mix it with some sweet feed, which has molasses in it, and it is the equivalent of candy for livestock. The horses also look forward to coming inside at night away from the flies that pester them all day.
Nick arrived home about 30 minutes ago, and I don't know if he checked to see if the horses were in and fed or not. He certainly didn't ask me, he went right into the computer room and started watching something on the computer. Speaking of the computer, I was looking in his notebook when he practises his Ukrainian, and he has phrases like ' I never touch her' and 'you are my only one' translated. I went into his bedroom to get the chair in there to try to reach the skylight and I noticed two T shirts on top of his suitcase that say 'MOSSAD' - the Institute of Intelligence and Special Operations. Is he trying to tell this lady that this is where he works?
A beautiful summer day. I slept in, as I usually do, as a result of Nick getting up at 430am and using the bathroom and flushing the toilet. That is something I was brought up not to do during the night, once it is agreed upon amongst members of a household. He never used to do it either, until a couple of months ago, because he knows it wakes me up. Actually, nearly everything wakes me up.
After using the bathroom, Nick will usually go downstairs to make a coffee or get a glass of water and then he will read for a an hour or two. As a result of the weather being so humid and warm, he and I have been sleeping with our bedroom doors open and so when he has the light on in his room, I keep waking up. And shortly after he quits reading and turns off the light to go back to sleep, my alarm goes off and I have to get up for the day. So on my days off, I roll over and go back to sleep until I am convinced I am well rested.
Nick and I took the lawn mower apart and I succeeded in finding the tools we needed to do this in impressive time. It was great, he described what it was I should be looking for and while he was still muttering that Salter had stolen them and they couldn't be found anywhere in the house, I would present them to him. Part of it was luck, I will admit, and part of it was because I have cleaned up the basement and the garage, so if I know what something looks like, I am getting pretty good at finding it now. If I knew my tools better, this would be even easier.
So I got the back yard done, and the second section of the front that I had started when the mower decided to quit. I also cut some of the grass by the riding arena - an area we used to keep cut but we have let grow over the last two years. I decided to cut it again to make the property look neater.
Then I had to go to meet up with the guy who bought my daughter's car, just over an hour's drive away. I was not looking forward to making this trip in the middle of my day, but I did a couple of errands on the way, and got home by 630pm. I vacuumed and started to take the skylight down to clean it, but I realized it was to large and awkward for me to do alone, and I decided to wait until my next day off to do it when I could get Nick to help me take it down. I cut myself some spinach and beet greens and green onions from the garden for lunch tomorrow at work. The first produce of 2017!
I have some cucumbers coming up and also some squash, along with corn and beans, and Nick has tomatoes that will be ready soon. We didn't plant nearly as much as we have in previous years, but we always seem to have way more than we manage to use or give away. It's so exciting and rewarding at first, but picking the produce turns into a chore by the end of the season.
When I was putting a wash in, I took another look through the court documents that concerned Nick's wife just previous to myself, the one to whom I have just learned he has been paying $500 a month support. I was looking to see if her former last name was mentioned anywhere and it was. I had googled her using the same last name as Nick because that is how she was referred to in the stuff I found initially and nothing came up in the searches I did, so I am hoping I will find something interesting now that I have another name to do a new search with. I will do it at work so it doesn't show in the history on my laptop. Of course if he reads my posts he will find out what I know but I am counting on that being like finding a needle in a haystack. Nick isn't very good at finding things.
He wasn't home when I got back from dealing with the car, and I had a nice evening with myself and my dog. As it began to get dark around 830pm, I decided to go out and bring the horses in and feed them and the calf. The horses kept running up to the gate each time they saw me outside and I knew it was past the time they usually come in for their grain and water and a small pile of hay for them to munch on. They are out in the pasture all day, so they really don't need much in the way of hay, but grain is a real treat for them. We mix it with some sweet feed, which has molasses in it, and it is the equivalent of candy for livestock. The horses also look forward to coming inside at night away from the flies that pester them all day.
Nick arrived home about 30 minutes ago, and I don't know if he checked to see if the horses were in and fed or not. He certainly didn't ask me, he went right into the computer room and started watching something on the computer. Speaking of the computer, I was looking in his notebook when he practises his Ukrainian, and he has phrases like ' I never touch her' and 'you are my only one' translated. I went into his bedroom to get the chair in there to try to reach the skylight and I noticed two T shirts on top of his suitcase that say 'MOSSAD' - the Institute of Intelligence and Special Operations. Is he trying to tell this lady that this is where he works?
Wednesday, 9 August 2017
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
Wednesday, August 9, 2017
I feel a mix of exhilaration and frustration as I type tonight. I am filled with hope about the great things I know are to come as I break free from this toxic relationship and gain control of my own life again but I feel frustrated that there are restraints on what I can and cannot accomplish in a day or a week. Take for example tomorrow....I need to cut the grass but the mower needs to be fixed and Nick hasn't bothered to look at it yet. I ran over a pile of dirt he had dumped on the front lawn while plowing last winter and because it has been so dry, it stopped the mower blade and I wasn't able to re-start the thing. That was Monday. Tomorrow is Thursday and the grass is getting long. I am not off again until Sunday and who knows what the weather will be like. And then I tell myself 'it's just grass!!!'. The guy I had sold my daughter's car to (the car whose transmission gave up the ghost) called me today and he would like me to pick up the payment for the car tomorrow when he gets off of work around 4pm, which is over an hour's drive from here for me. And over an hour's drive back again, obviously. My point is that this will seriously cut into any productivity I may be able to muster. I always look forward to my days off and how much I will get done. But it never works out that way. First of all, I sleep in too late. Getting up around 9 is pretty usual for me and anytime before that is early. I remember that I used to get annoyed that stores and things didn't open until 8 or 9am when I was younger, but all of that has changed now. I guess I just need more sleep. I would never have been up after 1030pm 10 years ago either. But here it is 11pm.
I have been listening to all of the voice recordings I have made with my cell phone of conversations between Nick and myself. More often than not, these are actually just recordings of him yelling at me as I try to interject some words of defense or to question the validity of the accusations. I came to the one recording of March 3 of this year, when I am asking Nick about the $31,000 he has withdrawn from our mortgage to pay off his credit card, and his daughter is here but I have just arrived home from work and I am so pissed about this (and I have known for over a week about it but I didn't confront Nick with it until I had verified with the bank) and so I inadvertently draw her into the argument because I am not willing to postpone the showdown until a more convenient time, a more convenient time for Nick that is.
I had listened to this recording a number of times and I was tempted not to listen to it one more time, but for some reason I decided to play it anyway. There is a part in the argument when Nick's daughter threatens me and Nick tells her to stop. She says no, she won't, that she is serious about her threats, and then she says to her father 'I have done much worse than that before - remember what I did to Jane?'. Well I heard that sentence before but I didn't know who Jane was, and actually I didn't even identify the name she was saying as Jane. I thought she was talking about a friend of hers who she had had a falling out with. But she was talking about Nick's previous 'wife' Jane, the one he was paying the $500 a month support payment to. That I had just found out about a few days ago.
Very interesting, eh? So now I have to find what she did to Jane. I would love to locate this person and speak with her. Maybe there was a report filed by Jane with the police, if the 'thing she did' was serious enough. I intend to find out.
I feel a mix of exhilaration and frustration as I type tonight. I am filled with hope about the great things I know are to come as I break free from this toxic relationship and gain control of my own life again but I feel frustrated that there are restraints on what I can and cannot accomplish in a day or a week. Take for example tomorrow....I need to cut the grass but the mower needs to be fixed and Nick hasn't bothered to look at it yet. I ran over a pile of dirt he had dumped on the front lawn while plowing last winter and because it has been so dry, it stopped the mower blade and I wasn't able to re-start the thing. That was Monday. Tomorrow is Thursday and the grass is getting long. I am not off again until Sunday and who knows what the weather will be like. And then I tell myself 'it's just grass!!!'. The guy I had sold my daughter's car to (the car whose transmission gave up the ghost) called me today and he would like me to pick up the payment for the car tomorrow when he gets off of work around 4pm, which is over an hour's drive from here for me. And over an hour's drive back again, obviously. My point is that this will seriously cut into any productivity I may be able to muster. I always look forward to my days off and how much I will get done. But it never works out that way. First of all, I sleep in too late. Getting up around 9 is pretty usual for me and anytime before that is early. I remember that I used to get annoyed that stores and things didn't open until 8 or 9am when I was younger, but all of that has changed now. I guess I just need more sleep. I would never have been up after 1030pm 10 years ago either. But here it is 11pm.
I have been listening to all of the voice recordings I have made with my cell phone of conversations between Nick and myself. More often than not, these are actually just recordings of him yelling at me as I try to interject some words of defense or to question the validity of the accusations. I came to the one recording of March 3 of this year, when I am asking Nick about the $31,000 he has withdrawn from our mortgage to pay off his credit card, and his daughter is here but I have just arrived home from work and I am so pissed about this (and I have known for over a week about it but I didn't confront Nick with it until I had verified with the bank) and so I inadvertently draw her into the argument because I am not willing to postpone the showdown until a more convenient time, a more convenient time for Nick that is.
I had listened to this recording a number of times and I was tempted not to listen to it one more time, but for some reason I decided to play it anyway. There is a part in the argument when Nick's daughter threatens me and Nick tells her to stop. She says no, she won't, that she is serious about her threats, and then she says to her father 'I have done much worse than that before - remember what I did to Jane?'. Well I heard that sentence before but I didn't know who Jane was, and actually I didn't even identify the name she was saying as Jane. I thought she was talking about a friend of hers who she had had a falling out with. But she was talking about Nick's previous 'wife' Jane, the one he was paying the $500 a month support payment to. That I had just found out about a few days ago.
Very interesting, eh? So now I have to find what she did to Jane. I would love to locate this person and speak with her. Maybe there was a report filed by Jane with the police, if the 'thing she did' was serious enough. I intend to find out.
Monday, 7 August 2017
Monday, August 7, 2017
Monday, August 7, 2017
I spent most of the weekend with my daughter and enjoyed a much needed rest from the charades all day every day and night with Nick. After work on Saturday she and I went to dinner at our favorite little spot and on Sunday I brought some pizza home with me. I got to watch some TV which is a treat for me as we no longer get cable at the farm. Monday I was off and because it was a holiday here, my daughter was as well and we planted the hydrangea and asters and lupines and hostas I had in pots for her.
I turned off my phone when I went to bed as I usually do and when I looked at it this morning, Nick had texted me 5 or 6 times demanding to know where his deodorants and his cologne were. The texts were sent at 5am! They had been in the cabinet in the ensuite bathroom which he took down to wallpaper but which he hasn't put back up yet. So when I tidied up the bedroom the other day, I put all that stuff in the main bathroom, in the closet. I showed him where I had put the stuff, along with his shaving gear and everything else that was in that cabinet.
I spent most of the weekend with my daughter and enjoyed a much needed rest from the charades all day every day and night with Nick. After work on Saturday she and I went to dinner at our favorite little spot and on Sunday I brought some pizza home with me. I got to watch some TV which is a treat for me as we no longer get cable at the farm. Monday I was off and because it was a holiday here, my daughter was as well and we planted the hydrangea and asters and lupines and hostas I had in pots for her.
I turned off my phone when I went to bed as I usually do and when I looked at it this morning, Nick had texted me 5 or 6 times demanding to know where his deodorants and his cologne were. The texts were sent at 5am! They had been in the cabinet in the ensuite bathroom which he took down to wallpaper but which he hasn't put back up yet. So when I tidied up the bedroom the other day, I put all that stuff in the main bathroom, in the closet. I showed him where I had put the stuff, along with his shaving gear and everything else that was in that cabinet.
When I got home this evening it was indeed obvious that he had gone through every drawer in the house. At 5am in the morning. He had pulled out all the drawers of his dresser and night table and had left the contents all over the bed and had left most of the drawers out on the chairs as well as on the bed and the ones that were still in the dresser were still halfway open with the stuff spilling out of them.
Nick also threw a tantrum tonight as he was unloading the dishwasher. He was taking the silverware out of its tray and something was caught, so he banged the whole thing 3 or 4 times against the counter. I was very surprised that nothing was smashed. He was so violent it about it I just stood there and held my breath.
I vacuumed and mopped the floors and generally tidied the place up...cleaned the bathrooms and wiped the stove and fridge and kitchen counters and table, and dusted in the bedrooms and hallway.
Nick was in a terrible mood, he just banged things around all night and slammed the door to his bedroom a couple of times. I showed him where his toiletries had been all along and I don't think he was too pleased about the simplicity of the whole episode. Just like the other day when he couldn't find the roofing sealant. He just hadn't looked in the place he had put it. He texted me that it had 'magically re-appeared'. His words exactly.
Friday, 4 August 2017
Friday, August 4, 2017
Friday, August 4, 2017
Just a short post tonight. I worked all day and I am feeling tired. I was off yesterday and didn't get as much accomplished as I had hoped. I got up at a decent hour - which for me is about 9am - and then I tidied up my bedroom and put absolutely everything away so it is rather immaculate, if I may say so myself - and after that I tried to get up the energy to go out and cut the grass. I plan to go to my daughter's tomorrow night after work and then go to work from there Sunday morning and stay again Sunday night and for my day off Monday, so I figured I should get the grass done as the next chance I had might not be until next Thursday, unless I planned to get back from my daughter's early enough on Monday to do it then. I ended up discussing a few things with Nick which included my other daughter's car that had been towed to his buddy's place and which one of his employees had offered to buy from me. About four months ago. So Nick made a call and it turned out that the transmission he had bought was not the right one and the guy had had to buy another one out of pocket as the company who sold Nick the original one had refused to take it back. So Nick will take the original back and get a refund and I will pay the guy for the one he had to buy and then he can pay me the negotiated price.
The company I had rented the dumpster from had not picked up the bbq and tvs I had left beside it. They had picked up the dumpster and I had paid them for it but they had promised to take the other stuff because I had asked specifically about it at the beginning. I sent the guy an email, but after 4 days I had no reply. Nick had been the one who had carried the tvs outside and wasn't happy with the idea of bringing them back into the basement, so he called the guy and they were picked up within about 3 or 4 hours. At least they are gone.
So I went out to cut the grass and I was more than half-way through and I was mowing over a pile of gravel Nick had left behind with the tractor while moving snow and the lawn mower ground to a stop and Nick discovered the belt needed to be replaced when he looked at it after it refused to start back up for me. I decided to get the whipper snipper out. Which took me about half an hour to get the plastic cord put on properly and I was only able to work for about 20 minutes before it became all tangled. I re-wound it and cut a bit more but when it frigged up for the second time I called it a day with doing the lawn. I was covered with bits of grass and weeds, and it was hot and humid and everything was sticking to everything else. I tried to clean myself up with a facecloth and towel but ended up jumping into the shower instead.
I started cleaning out the 2nd living room which we have only used as a gym which is a sin because it is a beautiful room with a floor to ceiling fireplace and the entire room is 2 stories high, with wooden beams in the ceiling. I have been busy at work because two main staff are off on holidays and although I am totally enjoying the results of cleaning and tidying the entire house, it is starting to take its toll I guess. I had a terrible time digging up the energy to do stuff on Thursday. I did spend some time working in the garden and doing some weeding which always relaxes and invigorates me. Just to see things growing makes me happy. And the garden is such a rewarding place in the middle of the summer.
Nick has been pestering me that he can't find his gun paperwork - his permits and course information. I did see it when I was sorting through things, so when I was downstairs putting a wash in, I decided to look through a box of papers I had set aside for him to go through. I actually had set aside 6 or 7 boxes for him to sort through, but all of them still sit there, untouched. Anyway, as I was looking for the gun stuff, I ran across a court document in which Nick is ordered to pay the girlfriend before me $500 per month and to maintain her on his drug plan from his work for as long as she is eligible. I knew he had been in a relationship with this woman before me but I had no idea he was still supporting her. He led me to believe she was just a previous girlfriend and although he has never called her by name, I know who she is because her name came up when he was adding me onto a Costco membership and my name was replacing hers - the cashier making the change asked if her name was being removed. It makes me wonder who else he may be supporting. It also explains where some of his monthly income is disappearing.
He doesn't know that I know and I am going to keep it that way. I will keep that information as ammunition if and when the financial disclosure ever appears. At least now I have a better idea of what should be divulged.
Nick was attempting to re-seal the barn roof yesterday and he was yelling at me because he couldn't find the second tub of sealant he had bought. He texted me at work today to tell me he wasn't going to finish the roof and it could just leak, because the sealant had been stolen by Salter. I knew it hadn't been stolen of course, and I knew it had to be in the barn somewhere because I knew it wasn't in the garage or the basement. He texted me around supper time to tell me 'it had magically appeared in the storage room in the barn'. Too late for him to finish the roof today, unfortunately. And tomorrow being his Sabbath, it won't get dome tomorrow either. Maybe it will be done by the time I return home from my daughter's. But I won't cross my fingers or hold my breath.
Just a short post tonight. I worked all day and I am feeling tired. I was off yesterday and didn't get as much accomplished as I had hoped. I got up at a decent hour - which for me is about 9am - and then I tidied up my bedroom and put absolutely everything away so it is rather immaculate, if I may say so myself - and after that I tried to get up the energy to go out and cut the grass. I plan to go to my daughter's tomorrow night after work and then go to work from there Sunday morning and stay again Sunday night and for my day off Monday, so I figured I should get the grass done as the next chance I had might not be until next Thursday, unless I planned to get back from my daughter's early enough on Monday to do it then. I ended up discussing a few things with Nick which included my other daughter's car that had been towed to his buddy's place and which one of his employees had offered to buy from me. About four months ago. So Nick made a call and it turned out that the transmission he had bought was not the right one and the guy had had to buy another one out of pocket as the company who sold Nick the original one had refused to take it back. So Nick will take the original back and get a refund and I will pay the guy for the one he had to buy and then he can pay me the negotiated price.
The company I had rented the dumpster from had not picked up the bbq and tvs I had left beside it. They had picked up the dumpster and I had paid them for it but they had promised to take the other stuff because I had asked specifically about it at the beginning. I sent the guy an email, but after 4 days I had no reply. Nick had been the one who had carried the tvs outside and wasn't happy with the idea of bringing them back into the basement, so he called the guy and they were picked up within about 3 or 4 hours. At least they are gone.
So I went out to cut the grass and I was more than half-way through and I was mowing over a pile of gravel Nick had left behind with the tractor while moving snow and the lawn mower ground to a stop and Nick discovered the belt needed to be replaced when he looked at it after it refused to start back up for me. I decided to get the whipper snipper out. Which took me about half an hour to get the plastic cord put on properly and I was only able to work for about 20 minutes before it became all tangled. I re-wound it and cut a bit more but when it frigged up for the second time I called it a day with doing the lawn. I was covered with bits of grass and weeds, and it was hot and humid and everything was sticking to everything else. I tried to clean myself up with a facecloth and towel but ended up jumping into the shower instead.
I started cleaning out the 2nd living room which we have only used as a gym which is a sin because it is a beautiful room with a floor to ceiling fireplace and the entire room is 2 stories high, with wooden beams in the ceiling. I have been busy at work because two main staff are off on holidays and although I am totally enjoying the results of cleaning and tidying the entire house, it is starting to take its toll I guess. I had a terrible time digging up the energy to do stuff on Thursday. I did spend some time working in the garden and doing some weeding which always relaxes and invigorates me. Just to see things growing makes me happy. And the garden is such a rewarding place in the middle of the summer.
Nick has been pestering me that he can't find his gun paperwork - his permits and course information. I did see it when I was sorting through things, so when I was downstairs putting a wash in, I decided to look through a box of papers I had set aside for him to go through. I actually had set aside 6 or 7 boxes for him to sort through, but all of them still sit there, untouched. Anyway, as I was looking for the gun stuff, I ran across a court document in which Nick is ordered to pay the girlfriend before me $500 per month and to maintain her on his drug plan from his work for as long as she is eligible. I knew he had been in a relationship with this woman before me but I had no idea he was still supporting her. He led me to believe she was just a previous girlfriend and although he has never called her by name, I know who she is because her name came up when he was adding me onto a Costco membership and my name was replacing hers - the cashier making the change asked if her name was being removed. It makes me wonder who else he may be supporting. It also explains where some of his monthly income is disappearing.
He doesn't know that I know and I am going to keep it that way. I will keep that information as ammunition if and when the financial disclosure ever appears. At least now I have a better idea of what should be divulged.
Nick was attempting to re-seal the barn roof yesterday and he was yelling at me because he couldn't find the second tub of sealant he had bought. He texted me at work today to tell me he wasn't going to finish the roof and it could just leak, because the sealant had been stolen by Salter. I knew it hadn't been stolen of course, and I knew it had to be in the barn somewhere because I knew it wasn't in the garage or the basement. He texted me around supper time to tell me 'it had magically appeared in the storage room in the barn'. Too late for him to finish the roof today, unfortunately. And tomorrow being his Sabbath, it won't get dome tomorrow either. Maybe it will be done by the time I return home from my daughter's. But I won't cross my fingers or hold my breath.
Wednesday, 2 August 2017
Wednesday, August 2, 2017
Wednesday, August 2, 2017
It is 10:30pm and I am starting to calm down. I have finished a glass of wine and poured a second. I am off tomorrow.
I got home from work about an hour ago and Nick was out. I had asked him several times to make or dig up a key for the real estate agent to put in the lock box for showings but he didn't bother and so I had to give her my key when she came out to the farm to leave the box on the door. He also promised then to make me another key. Which he didn't. And I was reminded of that tonight when I realized I did not have a key to get into the house. I called Nick several times but I am sue he just looked at the number and muted the call, so I texted him and asked him where he was and he said he was on his way home. Which he always says - even if I am with him and we are no where close to where we are supposed to be, he will say we are almost there - so I know exactly what on his way means - absolutely nothing. I asked him where he was instead and he told me exit 2A which is about 35 minutes away. I was rather pissed.
I walked around the house and tried all the doors and some of the easiest windows to access, but all were locked. I knew I could get inside through the sliding deck door off my daughter's bedroom but this would entail putting a ladder up to the second floor verandah at the back of the house. I don't like climbing ladders but I had done a fair bit lately while painting the barn and I had also climbed up onto the roof of the barn the day before yesterday to take pictures of the leaky roof and the can of sealant that had been up there for two years now. So I felt I was probably capable of getting up and onto the deck between the two bedrooms.
I found the ladder up against the barn and I managed to get into the house. Then I put the ladder back where I found it so Nick wouldn't immediately know how I had broken in. I hear him downstairs now but he hasn't spoken to me yet. I have my cell phone ready to tape the conversation if it turns into an argument, which it usually does.
He is getting so paranoid lately. I mean, he has been for a long time but now he is telling me that someone is using our internet and that they somehow know our password. I don't even know the password so I don't know how I would be able to give it to someone. But Nick just keeps insisting that the internet company tells him that our connection is slow because someone else is logging on.
He puts a wooden block behind his rear car tire so he will know if someone has driven his car. He locks the door to the bedroom where the computer is so only he can get in there. I don't know the password to get into his computer anymore. And I can hear him down in the kitchen at the moment unlocking the cupboard where he keeps his turmeric and honey and olive oil and I'm not sure what else. Pretty valuable stuff I guess.
He took my old phonograph the other day and he said he did it so I would know how it feels like to have your belongings stolen. You know, if I were taking his stuff I could see that making sense, but just because he can't find something doesn't mean it is stolen. But in his mind, that is the logical explanation. If he can't find it then it must not be there. No chance he has left it lying around somewhere. Not like he left his chainsaw in the bucket of the tractor and forgot it there until he used the bucket again. I have to keep reminding myself that I can't reason with him. If he says something is so, then it has to be that way. Because he said so and he is always right.
The house is always such a mess. I try to keep it tidy but he is such a slob. The female dog is in heat and she is spotting everywhere. The carpet in Nick's room was quite gross with spots which I cleaned up but he has let her back in there and the carpet is filthy again. She has also been allowed on his bed and the sheets have a bunch of large blood stains on them. They are gross to look at if you know they are from a dog, but they are absolutely disgusting if you don't know that and think they are from a human. Because Nick never makes his bed, they are out in plain view of anyone who walks into the room. Of course I will wash the sheets and clean the carpet again, but I am going to wait until the dog is finished her cycle.
It is 10:30pm and I am starting to calm down. I have finished a glass of wine and poured a second. I am off tomorrow.
I got home from work about an hour ago and Nick was out. I had asked him several times to make or dig up a key for the real estate agent to put in the lock box for showings but he didn't bother and so I had to give her my key when she came out to the farm to leave the box on the door. He also promised then to make me another key. Which he didn't. And I was reminded of that tonight when I realized I did not have a key to get into the house. I called Nick several times but I am sue he just looked at the number and muted the call, so I texted him and asked him where he was and he said he was on his way home. Which he always says - even if I am with him and we are no where close to where we are supposed to be, he will say we are almost there - so I know exactly what on his way means - absolutely nothing. I asked him where he was instead and he told me exit 2A which is about 35 minutes away. I was rather pissed.
I walked around the house and tried all the doors and some of the easiest windows to access, but all were locked. I knew I could get inside through the sliding deck door off my daughter's bedroom but this would entail putting a ladder up to the second floor verandah at the back of the house. I don't like climbing ladders but I had done a fair bit lately while painting the barn and I had also climbed up onto the roof of the barn the day before yesterday to take pictures of the leaky roof and the can of sealant that had been up there for two years now. So I felt I was probably capable of getting up and onto the deck between the two bedrooms.
I found the ladder up against the barn and I managed to get into the house. Then I put the ladder back where I found it so Nick wouldn't immediately know how I had broken in. I hear him downstairs now but he hasn't spoken to me yet. I have my cell phone ready to tape the conversation if it turns into an argument, which it usually does.
He is getting so paranoid lately. I mean, he has been for a long time but now he is telling me that someone is using our internet and that they somehow know our password. I don't even know the password so I don't know how I would be able to give it to someone. But Nick just keeps insisting that the internet company tells him that our connection is slow because someone else is logging on.
He puts a wooden block behind his rear car tire so he will know if someone has driven his car. He locks the door to the bedroom where the computer is so only he can get in there. I don't know the password to get into his computer anymore. And I can hear him down in the kitchen at the moment unlocking the cupboard where he keeps his turmeric and honey and olive oil and I'm not sure what else. Pretty valuable stuff I guess.
He took my old phonograph the other day and he said he did it so I would know how it feels like to have your belongings stolen. You know, if I were taking his stuff I could see that making sense, but just because he can't find something doesn't mean it is stolen. But in his mind, that is the logical explanation. If he can't find it then it must not be there. No chance he has left it lying around somewhere. Not like he left his chainsaw in the bucket of the tractor and forgot it there until he used the bucket again. I have to keep reminding myself that I can't reason with him. If he says something is so, then it has to be that way. Because he said so and he is always right.
The house is always such a mess. I try to keep it tidy but he is such a slob. The female dog is in heat and she is spotting everywhere. The carpet in Nick's room was quite gross with spots which I cleaned up but he has let her back in there and the carpet is filthy again. She has also been allowed on his bed and the sheets have a bunch of large blood stains on them. They are gross to look at if you know they are from a dog, but they are absolutely disgusting if you don't know that and think they are from a human. Because Nick never makes his bed, they are out in plain view of anyone who walks into the room. Of course I will wash the sheets and clean the carpet again, but I am going to wait until the dog is finished her cycle.
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