Wednesday, August 2, 2017

Wednesday, August 2, 2017

It is 10:30pm and I am starting to calm down. I have finished a glass of wine and poured a second. I am off tomorrow.

I got home from work about an hour ago and Nick was out. I had asked him several times to make or dig up a key for the real estate agent to put in the lock box for showings but he didn't bother and so I had to give her my key when she came out to the farm to leave the box on the door. He also promised then to make me another key. Which he didn't. And I was reminded of that tonight when I realized I did not have a key to get into the house. I called Nick several times but I am sue he just looked at the number and muted the call, so I texted him and asked him where he was and he said he was on his way home. Which he always says - even if I am with him and we are no where close to where we are supposed to be, he will say we are almost there - so I know exactly what on his way means - absolutely nothing. I asked him where he was instead and he told me exit 2A which is about 35 minutes away. I was rather pissed.

I walked around the house and tried all the doors and some of the easiest windows to access, but all were locked. I knew I could get inside through the sliding deck door off my daughter's bedroom but this would entail putting a ladder up to the second floor verandah at the back of the house. I don't like climbing ladders but I had done a fair bit lately while painting the barn and I had also climbed up onto the roof of the barn the day before yesterday to take pictures of the leaky roof and the can of sealant that had been up there for two years now. So I felt I was probably capable of getting up and onto the deck between the two bedrooms.

I found the ladder up against the barn and I managed to get into the house. Then I put the ladder back where I found it so Nick wouldn't immediately know how I had broken in. I hear him downstairs now but he hasn't spoken to me yet. I have my cell phone ready to tape the conversation if it turns into an argument, which it usually does.

He is getting so paranoid lately. I mean, he has been for a long time but now he is telling me that someone is using our internet and that they somehow know our password. I don't even know the password so I don't know how I would be able to give it to someone. But Nick just keeps insisting that the internet company tells him that our connection is slow because someone else is logging on.
He puts a wooden block behind his rear car tire so he will know if someone has driven his car. He locks the door to the bedroom where the computer is so only he can get in there. I don't know the password to get into his computer anymore. And I can hear him down in the kitchen at the moment unlocking the cupboard where he keeps his turmeric and honey and olive oil and I'm not sure what else. Pretty valuable stuff I guess.

He took my old phonograph the other day and he said he did it so I would know how it feels like to have your belongings stolen. You know, if I were taking his stuff I could see that making sense, but just because he can't find something doesn't mean it is stolen. But in his mind, that is the logical explanation. If he can't find it then it must not be there. No chance he has left it lying around somewhere. Not like he left his chainsaw in the bucket of the tractor and forgot it there until he used the bucket again. I have to keep reminding myself that I can't reason with him. If he says something is so, then it has to be that way. Because he said so and he is always right.

The house is always such a mess. I try to keep it tidy but he is such a slob. The female dog is in heat and she is spotting everywhere. The carpet in Nick's room was quite gross with spots which I cleaned up but he has let her back in there and the carpet is filthy again. She has also been allowed on his bed and the sheets have a bunch of large blood stains on them. They are gross to look at if you know they are from a dog, but they are absolutely disgusting if you don't know that and think they are from a human. Because Nick never makes his bed, they are out in plain view of anyone who walks into the room. Of course I will wash the sheets and clean the carpet again, but I am going to wait until the dog is finished her cycle.