Monday, July 17, 2017
Well a much better day today. I got a lot accomplished and Nick was away most of the afternoon which was peaceful.
He signed the real estate listing before he left. We had decided on $319, 000 as the price but when she was here he insisted on $328, 000 so I didn't argue in case he changed his mind and refused to sign at all. The 'for sale' sign is now up!
The agent and I managed to take quite a few pictures by moving things around the rooms as most of the rooms have stuff in them that is going to be packed up. I actually filled up my car this evening so I can drop stuff off at the storage unit after work tomorrow night on my way to the airport to pick up my daughter.
I spent most of the afternoon cleaning up the last room in the basement and I believe I found about half of the tools that Nick said were stolen. He wouldn't admit it when I showed them to him, but I know enough about tools to know that what I found includes a lot of what he is missing. I found most of it on the bottom shelf of an old bookcase that was shoved up against another bookcase and the stuff was all piled on top of itself almost as if the bookcase had fallen over or the shelves had tumbled out. I even vacuumed up the spider webs in the rafters and filled three large garbage bags with wood chips and pieces of bark that was laying all over the floor as a result of stacking wood for the furnace down there and also having the electric wood splitter there as well. I washed 3 or 4 barn jackets and hung them out on the clothesline and I also washed a couple of horse blankets. I seem to get so much more done when Nick is away. I think it has more to do with draining of motivation when he is here, just sitting on the computer while I slave away. Today he got home around 4 and I was upstairs on the bed with my laptop with my left foot up on a pillow while I sent some of the pictures of the property I had taken a few weeks ago off to the agent. When I thought my foot felt better I got up and went out to cut the grass in the back yard which was getting pretty high. I don't know what I did to my foot but my baby toe is very sore and I have been taping it tightly to the rest of my foot since Wednesday. It was so painful this afternoon after I had spent just 10 minutes at the grass that I was nearly in tears. I took some pain relievers and re-taped it and changed into a pair of my daughter's old sneakers that are 2 sizes too big for me and all this made a huge difference. After I got my upset stomach under control from the pills I got an energy spurt and I managed to finish all that I had hoped to do tonight -
cutting that grass, dragging the pile of bags and junk I had removed from the basement out to dumpster, loading up my car with the boxes I had packed for storage and making up the bed in Nick's daughter's room (the one he has been sleeping in) and cleaning it up so I could take pictures. And then sending them off to the real estate agent.
Nick just came to my bedroom door and yelled at me for putting the stuff from his dresser into a small cardboard box and setting it back on the dresser. I even was careful and thoughtful enough to place some of the things back on the dresser rather than leave them in the box - like his glasses, keys, reading light etc., things I know he will be looking for right away. No mention of how neat and clean the room looks, just a lot of banging and slamming doors. Great. 10:20 at night.
I put the stuff in a box because I figured if someone wants to look at the house then the box can just be picked up and put in the closet and the room will be neat with minimal effort. I know what it is like to live in a house that's up for sale and you have to have these strategies if you are going to keep your sanity.
He is getting himself a snack now and I guess I will just have to wait until he is finished his banging around. So childish. He is banging stuff around to show that he is pissed off and I am the one who spent all day cleaning and tidying and packing stuff up and cutting the grass on a hot and humid day with a sore foot while he spent the day in town doing errands and then sat in front of the computer for hours. He got up and went out to the barn to shovel and bring the horses in which took about 30 minutes in total. I guess maybe he expected I should be shovelling out the barn each day I have off like I used to when we had thirteen horses. But it's the only thing he does all day - and sometimes he doesn't even bother to do this - so I am not even going to consider doing it unless he refuses. I don't have the heart to let the horses have to spend the night in dirty stalls. I know they don't mind a day or two of manure, but I do.
Man I wish he would quit his banging. Now he is throwing chairs around. Or doing the jitterbug with them haha. Is he ever in a rage! About his stuff being put in a box? More likely about his internet lady or ladies letting him down. I think now he is still communicating with the one he went to visit. He writes things like 'why don't you write me?' and 'I can wait for you' in his Ukrainian practice scribbler. I look in it every day or two when he has gone out of the house to see what I can find out. I saw things like 'will you marry me' and 'you are my life' as well as the woman's name which was the same name on the Western Union money transfer receipt that I found. So every little bit of information is a piece of the puzzle. It may not mean something right away but I have learned that if you are patient and keep your eyes and ears and mind open, the truth will be revealed in time. How's that for some deep thinking?
Well Nick has finally slammed the door to his bedroom so I think I am safe to power down my computer and turn off my light. A good day all things considered. I guess the months and months of talking about putting the place up for sale are over and the doing has begun.
Monday, 17 July 2017
Sunday, 16 July 2017
Sunday, July 16, 2017
Sunday, July 16, 2017
Another long day of painting and trying to clean up around here. I tried to make an entry here last night, but my computer had updates planned instead.
After work yesterday I had to have my daughter's car towed to a garage so it can be looked at, I think something is wrong with whatever it is that you use to change gears with in an automatic. Linkage? We thought it just wouldn't start but the tow truck guy jumped it and then when I tried to move it that is when I noticed it was very stiff and difficult to put into park, reverse, drive, etc.
I got up today and began to finish up painting the barn. I did get it all done except for some of the white trim that was up at the very top. I couldn't reach it with the extension ladder and although Nick put the bucket of the tractor up a couple of times so I could paint the main part of the barn, I couldn't be bothered to ask him to do it the 3 or 4 more times it would take to complete it entirely.
I tidied up a bit inside as the real estate agent is coming tomorrow. I noticed when I was vacuuming the living room that my antique phonograph was not in its usual spot so I asked Nick where it was and he told me Salter had taken it. Nick did admit after a lot of yelling that he took it and moved it downstairs to make a point. What exact point he was trying to make I am not sure. His logic evades me. I have to remind myself sometimes that there is no way to reason with him because his sense of reason is so distorted that it is just a waste of time and effort to try.
At the moment he is sighing and swearing and talking to himself as he walks into his bedroom and then stomps back out again and seems to be looking for something. I have my door open because it is so warm but I guess that is a good thing as he doesn't have to be very loud in order for me to hear his performance.
I must admit I do find it frustrating when I am working my heart around here day after day to fix this place up to sell while Nick sits on his computer all day. Today it was X Factor auditions he was watching and he had it turned up full blast while he spent about an hour in the ensuite bathroom getting it ready to put the wallpaper up. Then he announced that all of his sandpaper had been stolen so he wouldn't be able to do any more. So instead he spent another 5 or 6 hours sitting in front of the computer screen until he went out at dusk to shovel the stalls and bring the horses in. And then he was right back at it again. I honestly don't know what a person can do with a computer for that many hours a day, every day. My bum would be numb.
Another long day of painting and trying to clean up around here. I tried to make an entry here last night, but my computer had updates planned instead.
After work yesterday I had to have my daughter's car towed to a garage so it can be looked at, I think something is wrong with whatever it is that you use to change gears with in an automatic. Linkage? We thought it just wouldn't start but the tow truck guy jumped it and then when I tried to move it that is when I noticed it was very stiff and difficult to put into park, reverse, drive, etc.
I got up today and began to finish up painting the barn. I did get it all done except for some of the white trim that was up at the very top. I couldn't reach it with the extension ladder and although Nick put the bucket of the tractor up a couple of times so I could paint the main part of the barn, I couldn't be bothered to ask him to do it the 3 or 4 more times it would take to complete it entirely.
I tidied up a bit inside as the real estate agent is coming tomorrow. I noticed when I was vacuuming the living room that my antique phonograph was not in its usual spot so I asked Nick where it was and he told me Salter had taken it. Nick did admit after a lot of yelling that he took it and moved it downstairs to make a point. What exact point he was trying to make I am not sure. His logic evades me. I have to remind myself sometimes that there is no way to reason with him because his sense of reason is so distorted that it is just a waste of time and effort to try.
At the moment he is sighing and swearing and talking to himself as he walks into his bedroom and then stomps back out again and seems to be looking for something. I have my door open because it is so warm but I guess that is a good thing as he doesn't have to be very loud in order for me to hear his performance.
I must admit I do find it frustrating when I am working my heart around here day after day to fix this place up to sell while Nick sits on his computer all day. Today it was X Factor auditions he was watching and he had it turned up full blast while he spent about an hour in the ensuite bathroom getting it ready to put the wallpaper up. Then he announced that all of his sandpaper had been stolen so he wouldn't be able to do any more. So instead he spent another 5 or 6 hours sitting in front of the computer screen until he went out at dusk to shovel the stalls and bring the horses in. And then he was right back at it again. I honestly don't know what a person can do with a computer for that many hours a day, every day. My bum would be numb.
Thursday, 13 July 2017
Thursday, July 13, 2017
10:30pm
I must say I am very pleased with the progress I made today cleaning up the basement. Three out of the four rooms look great. The last one has a lot of wood debris etc, but I am encouraged to tackle it now. I worked down there for five hours and then I came upstairs and started tidying up each room by packing away cluttery items. I washed a lot of bedding too. Jack didn't come today to shovel out the extension but he called and he may be out on Monday. He has a full-time job as well so he is squeezing this in.
Nick and his son loaded up the leg press machine and took that out of the basement as well. When he got back he brought his suitcase upstairs. I asked him if he was going on a trip but he didn't answer. I know he is communicating with a new lady now so I assume he will go over there again to meet her. I just hope he will still be here Monday to sign the listing agreement. But what a bad mood he is in lately. He said tonight as he got his supplements out that one of the bottles had pills missing as he had just opened it and it was nearly gone already. So of course that means that Salter was in here today to help himself.
10:30pm
I must say I am very pleased with the progress I made today cleaning up the basement. Three out of the four rooms look great. The last one has a lot of wood debris etc, but I am encouraged to tackle it now. I worked down there for five hours and then I came upstairs and started tidying up each room by packing away cluttery items. I washed a lot of bedding too. Jack didn't come today to shovel out the extension but he called and he may be out on Monday. He has a full-time job as well so he is squeezing this in.
Nick and his son loaded up the leg press machine and took that out of the basement as well. When he got back he brought his suitcase upstairs. I asked him if he was going on a trip but he didn't answer. I know he is communicating with a new lady now so I assume he will go over there again to meet her. I just hope he will still be here Monday to sign the listing agreement. But what a bad mood he is in lately. He said tonight as he got his supplements out that one of the bottles had pills missing as he had just opened it and it was nearly gone already. So of course that means that Salter was in here today to help himself.
Thursday, July 13, 2017
I will jump ahead to what is going on at present and attempt to fill in the missing weeks as I go.
We are putting the farm up for sale. I have contacted a real estate agent and she has been to the property to do an assessment as well as to give us a list of things to do to get ready to list. I am trying my best to get the stuff on that list done, but of course, I am getting no help or support (financial or other wise) from Nick. I had my daughters and my sister out on July 3 to help me paint the barn and that looks great, there is only a small piece to finish as well as the trim around 4 windows. We ran out of paint and I had to order more so that has arrived and I worked on the remaining parts on Monday. It is a little slow going by myself but I have managed to use the extension ladder and now I can reach any section I need to paint. Before we used only a step ladder and Nick did paint for about 30 minutes from the bucket of the tractor and did the very peak but that's when the paint ran out.
I have rented a 30yd dumpster bin for 30 days and it is sitting in the yard at the moment. I have two weeks left to fill it up. Actually it is about two-thirds full. I went through a lot of the boxes and stuff in the basement and tossed a lot out. On July 2, the evening before my daughters were to come out to do the barn, they decided to come out just after supper and we sorted through the majority of the boxes that were theirs that came back from university in Ontario. And some with Christmas odd and ends that didn't find their way into use. It was a lot of fun doing this and very productive.
I did manage to discard some of Nick's stuff along with mine and the girl's. I do feel bad about doing that, but it was a mistake, and I have been opening the boxes and taking a look through them to see what is inside. I put a number of boxes outside the computer room for him to look at, but they are still sitting there untouched after ten days. I even took pictures of them in the hallway. Oh and I hope the pictures I have started adding make this more interesting! Getting the photos from my phone to this computer is a somewhat tedious process, believe it or not, as they are transferred wirelessly and the internet here is spotty. It takes forever and I often do it at work where the wifi is so much faster and more reliable.
When I got home last night after work I noticed that Nick had piled up the stuff in the dumpster and then I realized he had gone through most of it. He had written me a note and left it on a box he had retrieved from the dumpster. (I must remember to come back here and insert a picture of the note!). The note let me know that I had thrown out some of his stuff, the tone was that I had done this intentionally, which was not the case. It would be so much easier if he could just lend a hand with cleaning out the basement, but I know this is not going to happen. I don't want to nag him or antagonize him on purpose or otherwise as I need him to sig n the listing agreement with the real estate agent. She was scheduled to come out this past Monday, but Nick texted me at work Friday morning to tell me he wasn't going to entertain the idea of signing until I had arranged the return of all of the things of his that are missing. So I let her know we had to cancel and then on Monday morning Nick says to me that we 'need to get the agent out here as soon as possible'. This was ten minutes before the time she originally had planned to be here. I re-scheduled her for the following Monday at 10am which is four days from now. I sure hope he doesn't decide to cancel a second time. he said he has figured out another way to deal with Salter, my imaginary boyfriend and neighbour as well as thief. Nick is threatening every day or so to get his thug buddy Bubba to join him in beating up this guy and 'leaving him dead or wishing he was dead'. Nick also left me a note saying he would 'visit' Salter if he had to.
I am off today and I had planned to finish up painting the barn but it is supposed to rain, although it hasn't started, so I think I will try to clear the last stuff out of the basement and then sweep, clean and tidy the four rooms down there and re-box/re-stack the stuff that has to be stored down there.
I put up a notice at the Irving gas station just down the road saying I was looking for someone young and strong to shovel out the extension to the barn which we had full of horses and the two calves only a few months ago. I shouldn't use the word 'only' because although it wasn't all that long ago, it has been three months since animals were in those stalls and Nick still has made no attempt to shovel them out. There were all just left the way the were the morning the horse that occupied went to its new home. I am proud to say all the horses went to good people, who will be the sole owners of our horses, so they will get the care and attention they need, and they will be ridden. We asked modest prices for them and some of them we gave away to friends of my mother's who live on farms close to my hometown. All but Invictus because he was sold to Randy who collects horses and doesn't do much at all with them. He leaves most of them put year long and his favorites he brings inside and keeps in straight stalls. Nick must have needed the money from him pretty badly to let him go there. But at least no one will whip him of put a sever bit in his mouth to make him behave.
I didn't sleep well last night, I feel that Nick is up to something. He has been banging and slamming around the house continually when I am home but I usually get some uninterrupted sleep in when he is sleeping. Last night however there was a black beetle in my bed that bit me twice before I got up and turned on the light and captured him in a bottle. The first time he bit me I just brushed him off thinking it was a spider, but the second time it was a hard bite and I jumped up to look at the spot under my arm where he had attacked me. I tried to get back to sleep but my mind was determined to convince me that Nick and his daughter had conspired and decided to get rid of me by having some deadly bug appear in my bed and do me in as I dreamed. I imagined the beetle had been investigated on and ordered from the internet. Neither Nick or his daughter do much else than cruise around on the computer every day. She doesn't work either.
I will jump ahead to what is going on at present and attempt to fill in the missing weeks as I go.
We are putting the farm up for sale. I have contacted a real estate agent and she has been to the property to do an assessment as well as to give us a list of things to do to get ready to list. I am trying my best to get the stuff on that list done, but of course, I am getting no help or support (financial or other wise) from Nick. I had my daughters and my sister out on July 3 to help me paint the barn and that looks great, there is only a small piece to finish as well as the trim around 4 windows. We ran out of paint and I had to order more so that has arrived and I worked on the remaining parts on Monday. It is a little slow going by myself but I have managed to use the extension ladder and now I can reach any section I need to paint. Before we used only a step ladder and Nick did paint for about 30 minutes from the bucket of the tractor and did the very peak but that's when the paint ran out.
I did manage to discard some of Nick's stuff along with mine and the girl's. I do feel bad about doing that, but it was a mistake, and I have been opening the boxes and taking a look through them to see what is inside. I put a number of boxes outside the computer room for him to look at, but they are still sitting there untouched after ten days. I even took pictures of them in the hallway. Oh and I hope the pictures I have started adding make this more interesting! Getting the photos from my phone to this computer is a somewhat tedious process, believe it or not, as they are transferred wirelessly and the internet here is spotty. It takes forever and I often do it at work where the wifi is so much faster and more reliable.
When I got home last night after work I noticed that Nick had piled up the stuff in the dumpster and then I realized he had gone through most of it. He had written me a note and left it on a box he had retrieved from the dumpster. (I must remember to come back here and insert a picture of the note!). The note let me know that I had thrown out some of his stuff, the tone was that I had done this intentionally, which was not the case. It would be so much easier if he could just lend a hand with cleaning out the basement, but I know this is not going to happen. I don't want to nag him or antagonize him on purpose or otherwise as I need him to sig n the listing agreement with the real estate agent. She was scheduled to come out this past Monday, but Nick texted me at work Friday morning to tell me he wasn't going to entertain the idea of signing until I had arranged the return of all of the things of his that are missing. So I let her know we had to cancel and then on Monday morning Nick says to me that we 'need to get the agent out here as soon as possible'. This was ten minutes before the time she originally had planned to be here. I re-scheduled her for the following Monday at 10am which is four days from now. I sure hope he doesn't decide to cancel a second time. he said he has figured out another way to deal with Salter, my imaginary boyfriend and neighbour as well as thief. Nick is threatening every day or so to get his thug buddy Bubba to join him in beating up this guy and 'leaving him dead or wishing he was dead'. Nick also left me a note saying he would 'visit' Salter if he had to.
I am off today and I had planned to finish up painting the barn but it is supposed to rain, although it hasn't started, so I think I will try to clear the last stuff out of the basement and then sweep, clean and tidy the four rooms down there and re-box/re-stack the stuff that has to be stored down there.
I put up a notice at the Irving gas station just down the road saying I was looking for someone young and strong to shovel out the extension to the barn which we had full of horses and the two calves only a few months ago. I shouldn't use the word 'only' because although it wasn't all that long ago, it has been three months since animals were in those stalls and Nick still has made no attempt to shovel them out. There were all just left the way the were the morning the horse that occupied went to its new home. I am proud to say all the horses went to good people, who will be the sole owners of our horses, so they will get the care and attention they need, and they will be ridden. We asked modest prices for them and some of them we gave away to friends of my mother's who live on farms close to my hometown. All but Invictus because he was sold to Randy who collects horses and doesn't do much at all with them. He leaves most of them put year long and his favorites he brings inside and keeps in straight stalls. Nick must have needed the money from him pretty badly to let him go there. But at least no one will whip him of put a sever bit in his mouth to make him behave.
I didn't sleep well last night, I feel that Nick is up to something. He has been banging and slamming around the house continually when I am home but I usually get some uninterrupted sleep in when he is sleeping. Last night however there was a black beetle in my bed that bit me twice before I got up and turned on the light and captured him in a bottle. The first time he bit me I just brushed him off thinking it was a spider, but the second time it was a hard bite and I jumped up to look at the spot under my arm where he had attacked me. I tried to get back to sleep but my mind was determined to convince me that Nick and his daughter had conspired and decided to get rid of me by having some deadly bug appear in my bed and do me in as I dreamed. I imagined the beetle had been investigated on and ordered from the internet. Neither Nick or his daughter do much else than cruise around on the computer every day. She doesn't work either.
Tuesday, 11 July 2017
Tuesday, July 11, 2017
Well, where to start? On March 9 I went to the RCMP with some of my concerns. Let me just say that on Saturday March 11 I left the farm with only my cell phone and my laptop and my purse and the chargers for both. And my car. My youngest daughter was on her way out for a visit but I contacted her and I met her at her at my other daughter's place instead. I spent the night there and then I went to my sister's place on Sunday March 12. I had Monday off as well and I came back to the farm to grab a few more of my belongings but Nick wasn't here and I had no key to get inside. I have no keys to my own house because Nick accuses me of giving them or copies of them to Salter and so the last time Nick changed the locks (the third time, I think) I asked him not to give me a key, that way I would be unable to give it to anyone. I stopped at Costco on my way back to my sister's and picked up a couple of pairs of pants and a couple of T-shirts to wear to work. I learned very quickly there is very little you really need and a lot you can live without.
I ended up staying at my sister's for about 10 weeks. During that time I managed to sell all the horses except Invictus and Paladin, who have both since gone to new homes. Paul did deliver them which I was thankful for, I had to pay him $100 for one of the deliveries but it was worth it. Paul had Paladin gelded which really surprised me but he went to the same stable as his half-brother Kronos - the father of the young lady who bought Kronos bought him - and Invictus disappeared one Saturday while I was at work just recently - I believe he was sold to the fellow who trucked him down from Ontario for us and who has always wanted to own him. I found it incredible that Paul had sold that horse to that guy, we both agreed that while this guy thinks he is good to his horses, he actually doesn't understand what they need or how to handle them properly. I believe Paul needed money so badly that he sold his favorite horse to this guy.
I moved back to the farm on May 18th. Paul had a trip planned for May 20th, a Saturday that I worked and I had to work the Friday as well so I brought my stuff back on my day off, the Thursday. He was going to Europe to meet the lady from the Ukraine he had been communicating with and to whom he had been sending money by Western Union. I found the receipts in his wallet. I saw pictures of her on his screen saver on the computer. I saw her name where he had written stuff in his Hilroy scribbler that he used to practise his Ukranian in.
He left Saturday May 20th and came back the second Monday following, about 10 days later. He had told me he would be back on the Friday but he didn't arrive back at the farm until the next Monday.
I had a wonderful time while he was away despite the fact that I had to get up early to feed the animals and put the horses out before I left for work at 8am and I had to bring them in and feed them again when I got home at 9pm.
Well, where to start? On March 9 I went to the RCMP with some of my concerns. Let me just say that on Saturday March 11 I left the farm with only my cell phone and my laptop and my purse and the chargers for both. And my car. My youngest daughter was on her way out for a visit but I contacted her and I met her at her at my other daughter's place instead. I spent the night there and then I went to my sister's place on Sunday March 12. I had Monday off as well and I came back to the farm to grab a few more of my belongings but Nick wasn't here and I had no key to get inside. I have no keys to my own house because Nick accuses me of giving them or copies of them to Salter and so the last time Nick changed the locks (the third time, I think) I asked him not to give me a key, that way I would be unable to give it to anyone. I stopped at Costco on my way back to my sister's and picked up a couple of pairs of pants and a couple of T-shirts to wear to work. I learned very quickly there is very little you really need and a lot you can live without.
I ended up staying at my sister's for about 10 weeks. During that time I managed to sell all the horses except Invictus and Paladin, who have both since gone to new homes. Paul did deliver them which I was thankful for, I had to pay him $100 for one of the deliveries but it was worth it. Paul had Paladin gelded which really surprised me but he went to the same stable as his half-brother Kronos - the father of the young lady who bought Kronos bought him - and Invictus disappeared one Saturday while I was at work just recently - I believe he was sold to the fellow who trucked him down from Ontario for us and who has always wanted to own him. I found it incredible that Paul had sold that horse to that guy, we both agreed that while this guy thinks he is good to his horses, he actually doesn't understand what they need or how to handle them properly. I believe Paul needed money so badly that he sold his favorite horse to this guy.
I moved back to the farm on May 18th. Paul had a trip planned for May 20th, a Saturday that I worked and I had to work the Friday as well so I brought my stuff back on my day off, the Thursday. He was going to Europe to meet the lady from the Ukraine he had been communicating with and to whom he had been sending money by Western Union. I found the receipts in his wallet. I saw pictures of her on his screen saver on the computer. I saw her name where he had written stuff in his Hilroy scribbler that he used to practise his Ukranian in.
He left Saturday May 20th and came back the second Monday following, about 10 days later. He had told me he would be back on the Friday but he didn't arrive back at the farm until the next Monday.
I had a wonderful time while he was away despite the fact that I had to get up early to feed the animals and put the horses out before I left for work at 8am and I had to bring them in and feed them again when I got home at 9pm.
Monday, 10 July 2017
Monday, July 10, 2017
Wow....sorry I have a lot of catching up to do here. So much has happened.
I thought my world was crazy when I wrote the last entry, but I never imagined how totally out of control it could actually get. Just like something you might see on TV.
I will have to continue tomorrow evening. I spent all day painting today and I am short of sleep lately. Nick has been banging just about anything you can slam or bang at all hours of the night. He decides to look for all kinds of random things at 1am and swears for hours while he searches. The other night he came into my bedroom at about 4am to rant that Salter has taken Nick's mother's teapot and pawned it for money. Coffee and milk are also missing. Maybe I should suggest that Nick take pictures of things, his memory sucks so much.
I will attempt to fill in some of the events of the past 3 or 4 months in the next few entries.
Thursday, 9 March 2017
Thursday, March 9, 2017
March 9, 2017
I am getting exhausted already with this latest turmoil. But I made a visit to the local RCMP station this afternoon to ask a few questions and let them know what is going on out here and get some advice on what I should or should not do. I hate finding out after all is said and done that I 'should have done this' and 'if only I had done that'. I had a good chat with the officer there and in the course of our discussion he told me he had listened to Nick's audio tapes in which Nick alleges I am having sex in our bedroom with this Chris person, or certainly with someone other than my husband; and in another tape he says I am greeting Chris at the door of our home and proceeding to engage in oral sex with him in the hallway where the voice recorder was hidden. The first tape was supposedly recorded while Nick was away for work and the second one on the Monday after Christmas 2015 when Nick was gone for the day and I was home alone. Actually I was expecting my daughter to visit that day but she decided to stay at her sister's for the night instead, which I did not know at the time the recording was made. The officer also told me he heard no other voices on the tapes except for mine and he did not hear any of the activities Nick alleges took place. I was extremely relieved to have him reveal this to me. Although it is perfectly clear to me what I hear on the audio recordings I was never absolutely sure what conclusion someone else would arrive at about what they were hearing. And I have only listened to the 'hallway tape' and although I have asked many times to be allowed to hear the bedroom tape and Nick has promised many times to play it for me (as well as for my mother and daughters) I have never heard it. The officer said he had listened to approximately 40 hours of tapes in total and in none of them did he hear what Nick said he did.
I spoke to my mother last night on my way home from work. I stayed late in order to deal with a couple of things that popped up during the day and that I wasn't able to begin to resolve until almost closing time. And which couldn't be completely resolved until today when I would be off and which the person who works the opposite shifts from me would be there and thus obligated to handle.
I hadn't yet shared the news about the $31,000.00 Nick withdrew from the credit made available by the pay down on the mortgage and of course it upset her. She told me to contact the ombudsman who helped consumers with banking matters - I am not clear on if there is one for all the financial institutions or one specifically for the TD bank but this ombudsman got results on her behalf with an identity mix-up a few years back which she had been unable to straighten out despite months of trying on her own. I have called the TD branch where we deal three times and left messages asking to speak to or meet with the manager and the last time I called I received a return call from the 'manager who usually deals with customer escalations'. He answered my questions and addressed most of my immediate concerns on the phone but I still want to meet with a manager in person. I thought I might be able to do this today but was too busy yesterday at work to schedule such a meeting and I realized this morning I could not expect to see anyone today and decided to wait until I could call and arrange it ahead of time. And to be honest I couldn't face driving all the way in there today.
We needed 'sweet feed' for the calves - which is called 'sweet feed' when you buy it for horses but 'beef builder' when you buy it for cattle and it is essentially the same thing. It is a feed with extra protein mixed up with some molasses to give it a sweet taste and the energy boost that any form of sugar will give an animal the same as it does humans. It is a nice treat for the livestock and it kicks up their metabolism a notch which helps to keep them a little warmer during the winter. The feed store where I normally pick up the feed for the livestock had only one bag left when I was there earlier in the week and so I decided to stop by the RCMP on my way to a feed store which is actually closer to the farm but is in the opposite direction from my work. I managed to get something accomplished even though I hadn't done what I intended to get done today.
I got up to help in the barn before I hopped in the shower and I asked Nick about the marriage agreement as we were downstairs getting ready to go out. He avoided the topic and I refused to let it drop and finally he said he would review it and discuss it with me on Monday. I hope we can come to some kind of statement of what is mine to take from the marriage which of course is really just about everything because I paid for virtually everything. He was to contribute sweat equity and know-how for projects and improvements which never did materialize. The only sweat equity put into the farm was mine - I white-washed the fences at the front of the property and around the riding arena and I pressure-washed the deck this summer. He did put up the addition on the barn but he has never finished it. It needs stall doors and floors and a water-tight roof at the very minimum. It's extremely annoying because he does know how to do all of these things but he lacks any motivation to start any of the dozens of little jobs that need doing around here.
Whenever I ask him about fixing this or that, or about when he plans finish something he always has an excuse which ultimately comes back to the Chris person. Either the Chris person has taken the tools he needs to do the work or Nick says he isn't willing to make improvements around here that are only going to benefit me and my boyfriend. He also always claims that me and this boyfriend are continuously contriving to get Nick to abandon the farm so the boyfriend can move right in and take Nick's place. I wish somehow someone would walk out of Nick's bedroom instead of Nick and help me turn this farm into the homestead and country paradise I have imagined it could be since the day I first laid eyes on it.
I am getting exhausted already with this latest turmoil. But I made a visit to the local RCMP station this afternoon to ask a few questions and let them know what is going on out here and get some advice on what I should or should not do. I hate finding out after all is said and done that I 'should have done this' and 'if only I had done that'. I had a good chat with the officer there and in the course of our discussion he told me he had listened to Nick's audio tapes in which Nick alleges I am having sex in our bedroom with this Chris person, or certainly with someone other than my husband; and in another tape he says I am greeting Chris at the door of our home and proceeding to engage in oral sex with him in the hallway where the voice recorder was hidden. The first tape was supposedly recorded while Nick was away for work and the second one on the Monday after Christmas 2015 when Nick was gone for the day and I was home alone. Actually I was expecting my daughter to visit that day but she decided to stay at her sister's for the night instead, which I did not know at the time the recording was made. The officer also told me he heard no other voices on the tapes except for mine and he did not hear any of the activities Nick alleges took place. I was extremely relieved to have him reveal this to me. Although it is perfectly clear to me what I hear on the audio recordings I was never absolutely sure what conclusion someone else would arrive at about what they were hearing. And I have only listened to the 'hallway tape' and although I have asked many times to be allowed to hear the bedroom tape and Nick has promised many times to play it for me (as well as for my mother and daughters) I have never heard it. The officer said he had listened to approximately 40 hours of tapes in total and in none of them did he hear what Nick said he did.
I spoke to my mother last night on my way home from work. I stayed late in order to deal with a couple of things that popped up during the day and that I wasn't able to begin to resolve until almost closing time. And which couldn't be completely resolved until today when I would be off and which the person who works the opposite shifts from me would be there and thus obligated to handle.
I hadn't yet shared the news about the $31,000.00 Nick withdrew from the credit made available by the pay down on the mortgage and of course it upset her. She told me to contact the ombudsman who helped consumers with banking matters - I am not clear on if there is one for all the financial institutions or one specifically for the TD bank but this ombudsman got results on her behalf with an identity mix-up a few years back which she had been unable to straighten out despite months of trying on her own. I have called the TD branch where we deal three times and left messages asking to speak to or meet with the manager and the last time I called I received a return call from the 'manager who usually deals with customer escalations'. He answered my questions and addressed most of my immediate concerns on the phone but I still want to meet with a manager in person. I thought I might be able to do this today but was too busy yesterday at work to schedule such a meeting and I realized this morning I could not expect to see anyone today and decided to wait until I could call and arrange it ahead of time. And to be honest I couldn't face driving all the way in there today.
We needed 'sweet feed' for the calves - which is called 'sweet feed' when you buy it for horses but 'beef builder' when you buy it for cattle and it is essentially the same thing. It is a feed with extra protein mixed up with some molasses to give it a sweet taste and the energy boost that any form of sugar will give an animal the same as it does humans. It is a nice treat for the livestock and it kicks up their metabolism a notch which helps to keep them a little warmer during the winter. The feed store where I normally pick up the feed for the livestock had only one bag left when I was there earlier in the week and so I decided to stop by the RCMP on my way to a feed store which is actually closer to the farm but is in the opposite direction from my work. I managed to get something accomplished even though I hadn't done what I intended to get done today.
I got up to help in the barn before I hopped in the shower and I asked Nick about the marriage agreement as we were downstairs getting ready to go out. He avoided the topic and I refused to let it drop and finally he said he would review it and discuss it with me on Monday. I hope we can come to some kind of statement of what is mine to take from the marriage which of course is really just about everything because I paid for virtually everything. He was to contribute sweat equity and know-how for projects and improvements which never did materialize. The only sweat equity put into the farm was mine - I white-washed the fences at the front of the property and around the riding arena and I pressure-washed the deck this summer. He did put up the addition on the barn but he has never finished it. It needs stall doors and floors and a water-tight roof at the very minimum. It's extremely annoying because he does know how to do all of these things but he lacks any motivation to start any of the dozens of little jobs that need doing around here.
Whenever I ask him about fixing this or that, or about when he plans finish something he always has an excuse which ultimately comes back to the Chris person. Either the Chris person has taken the tools he needs to do the work or Nick says he isn't willing to make improvements around here that are only going to benefit me and my boyfriend. He also always claims that me and this boyfriend are continuously contriving to get Nick to abandon the farm so the boyfriend can move right in and take Nick's place. I wish somehow someone would walk out of Nick's bedroom instead of Nick and help me turn this farm into the homestead and country paradise I have imagined it could be since the day I first laid eyes on it.
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